Lessons Learned(message 4 son)

There isn’t one day in my life that i DON’T think about my son(a lot). There isn’t a day in my life that goes by that a thought about mom or dad doesn’t cross my mind.I have dreams about them too.

Sometimes i cry-sometimes i just draw a blank.Other times i get angry but that’s not right either. Much of the mess was my own fault.

Human nature is such that when there’s an argument we blame ourselves then try to find a reason to blame the other side too.

Yes,i regret not being present at mom’s funeral. I try to picture what i must have put everyone through by not being there.

I’m sorry we’re not speaking but i can understand it.

I remember being questioned as to why we (husband and I)moved by mom and dad.

For one,we had to leave the house we were living in. Landlord showed us the door and tried to sell the house. He didn’t.Wonder why(eye roll).i thank God we were evicted. Best thing that could have happened to us. There were only 2 apartments available and one was across the street from the folks. The landlord, at the first apartment, was very late-and when we left he still hadn’t showed up.So we went to look at the 2nd one by mom and dad’s.Mom liked it.We liked it. They were both 2nd floor apartments so that wasn’t much of a choice. We all agreed it’d be more convenient if we lived across the street anyway.

It was a God send in the end.

Both mom and dad became seriously ill.We had no idea at the time how seriously ill both of them would become. I feel we took a lot for granted.

Husband and I agreed that if anything happened to mom-after dad passed-that we would move out.We stuck it out only for her. The steps were impossible. The heat was unbearable up there in the summer. The ambulance couldn’t even get a gurney up there for husband. It was a fire trap as well-there was only one exit out.

We did not consider any of that when we moved in. It wasn’t that important at the time.

There were no ulterior motives.

The choice was really that simple.

Unfortunately  I’m not sure I know my son anymore. He’s 40. By that age people change;sometimes a lot.He’s a good husband and father;his kids turned out well.

Can’t ask for more than that.Proud of him. I worry about the grand-daughter though. She’s absolutely terrific from what i’ve managed to gather.I just don’t like some of the things i see going on in the world.Things she could be influenced by. She looks like she’s her own person and mom and dad did a great job-still, I know how strong a pull the world can have, even on decent people.I’m not naive either. There are people out there who don’t have the best of intentions and she strikes me as being a very trusting person. It’s not that i don’t have concerns for son.Of course i do.

For that matter, i’m very sorry how it all turned out for my son. In fact,i often think what a good choice it would have been to move here when he was young, rather than live where we did. Nothing to do with my parents. They were good people. We’d have been close enough to see them but this town is a much nicer place. I can’t believe i would be saying that;someone  who lived her whole life stuck in the hometown.I never realized there could have been a life outside of it. He could have enrolled in the Catholic school up here.

We’d have had a nice home and much quieter life.Maybe,just maybe,things would have worked out differently. Speculation doesn’t help.It’s not going to change a thing.It’s just a thought that’s crossed my mind lately.Should i have been a better mother? No doubt! Should i have been a better person,period? *Sigh*  Definitely. I do think now, starting over here, MIGHT have made a difference.Other things would have mattered of course.Things like, not being an a…hole, would have made a difference.

It’s also possible I’m entirely wrong for even considering it.The truth is,  i trapped myself and him along with me.


 Mother had a way…

 CdeivKyWIAAmYNH.png large


Catholic & Voting Trump(yes,you heard that right)

Background:am a reverted Catholic. In case you’re wondering what a reverted Catholic is,will explain.There’s 2 kinds. One is the Catholic who wandered out the door in search of other faith traditions. They go Protestant and 9 times out of 10 end up virulently anti Catholic(we’ll talk about that one day). The other is the one who wandered out the door in rebellious pride. I’m the latter.

I gave up Catholicism for Hedonism. I attribute this fall from grace to two things of my own doing.PRIDE and SELFISHNESS(wanting to have my own way).

It didn’t end well. It’s such a destructive path it’s not worth taking it.

I came back after having one foot on a banana peel over the pit of hell.

So this gal is now happily married, alcohol and drug free and grateful for the Catholic Church. In fact, i truly appreciate ALL the teachings of the Catholic Church.

Obedience is not a bad thing.

So you ask,how can a devout Catholic vote for Trump? When you’re done reading why I can vote Trump in good conscience,please explain to me why you think I can’t, if you disagree.

He’s  pro life.I get complaints it’s a last second conversion.I don’t care. As long as a previously pro abortion person comes around that’s all that matters.As long as he keeps to his word that he will have Plannend Parenthood de-funded that’s all matters. We elected the so called conservatives to Congress [in the last elections] and not one of those people stood up to Obama. They funded everything. Or as Trump says; Politicians are all talk and no action.

George W Bush was pro life and for that reason i voted for him.Ok,is abortion still legal in the U.S.? Yep,sure is.Bush couldn’t do a thing to overturn Roe V Wade.

Every time we elect a pro life candidate,we get our hopes up and nothing changes. We cannot elect a pro abortion candidate because the outcome would be worse;but we get our expectations too high when a pro life candidate gets elected. I doubt very much, after all this time, that any one pro life President is going to change anything.On the other,  I don’t have any doubt that letting a pro abortion candidate get elected, will make things worse.I believe that a pro life Pres does what they CAN but that’s honestly very limited.

I am 100% certain that Trump is going to do everything he can to protect religious liberty. How he worships is up to him, as long as we as Catholics can practice our faith.

So why not Constitution Cruz? It’s real simple.

He’s a liar,cheat and fraud.He believes (good for him)that he’s anointed by God.Sorry Ted,I don’t. Your following resembles a cult,more than it does a political movement. As a Trump supporter I’m convinced Trump  is the best choice. A Cruz supporter acts more like they’ve chugged down the kool-aid(BRAINWASHED).

Trump has a checkered past with his failed marriages but he’s not putting himself out there as Saint Trump either.The Dems can’t use his past again him because those skeletons were out of the closet a long time ago.We’re going to have a few words about the  fraud,Cruz, [here] in the near future.

Now for the dust up in Colorado.

Word is that Trump should have known about the rules-so it’s his fault,right?

Tuesday, Aug. 25, 2015

“GOP executive committee has voted to cancel the traditional presidential preference poll after the national party changed its rules to require a state’s delegates to support the candidate who wins the caucus vote.”


“Republicans still will hold precinct caucus meetings in early 2016 to begin the process of selecting delegates for the national convention — but the 37 delegates are not pledged to any specific candidate.”


The Colorado system often favors anti-establishment candidates who draw a dedicated following among activists — as evidenced by Rick Santorum’s victory in 2012 caucus. So the party’s move may hurt GOP contenders such as Donald Trump.”


Article originally posted Aug 25,2015
So my questions are:

  1. Did they hold the Caucus? if so,when?
  2. Who did they vote for?
  3. Not one delegate voted Trump? They ALL voted Cruz? Is that possible?
  4. Were the rank and file party members aware of the rule change and that they would not be voting?









FLASHBACK: Colorado GOP Chair Said Trump Will ‘Absolutely Not’ Be Republican Nominee… IN HIDING AFTER VOTERLESS ELECTION… | tomfernandez28’s Blog

BY KATHRYN PORTER In an audio of Colorado Republican Party Chair Steve House speaking at an August 11th Pueblo County GOP meet-up, House made some interesting statements about Donald Trump. Here ar…

Source: FLASHBACK: Colorado GOP Chair Said Trump Will ‘Absolutely Not’ Be Republican Nominee… IN HIDING AFTER VOTERLESS ELECTION… | tomfernandez28’s Blog

Morning Offering

sacred heartO Jesus,through the Immaculate Heart of Mary;I offer you all my prayers,works,joys and sufferings of this day for all the intentions of your Sacred Heart,in union with the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass throughout the world,in reparation for my sins,for the intentions of all our associates and family near and far,and in particular for the intentions of the Holy Father.Amen.


It’s still the rasberry palace.After approx 2 yr of looking at the same background,images and colors became board to tears. When i first used the theme my husband went into tears, period. He called it the psychedelic pink theme and he hated it.
I was in the mood for the theme at the time-it was titled crazy little town and we lived in one.Now we live in a new home,in a new town with a new mellower life.So the blue reflects the current mellow mood-and husband exclaims,that looks much better!
So it stays(for another 2 yrs,God willing of course)until i get bored to tears again.
The only thing i don’t like are the orange links.How on earth do you change the color w/o fooling with the CSS?

Husband just glanced over and caught part of the title. He almost went into heart failure.”You’re not looking for more psychedelic pink ______are you?”

mouth shut

The blog is still going to cover many of the same topics;POLITICS,RELIGION, SCIENCE,MY GRANDDAUGHTER(ALEXA),CURRENT EVENTS and from time to time just things that seem interesting at the moment.

I don’t do celebrities or celebrity gossip. It’s not interesting.

welcome  Back to the new and hopefully improved palace.